The B.O.S.S. Effect (Believe Others are Super Stars)

"Treat a man as he is and he will remain as he is. Treat a man as he can and should be and he will become as he can and should be." — Stephen Covey, 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Ah, Civilization.

Where toilets flush. And, your body odor matters.

As our group's smell emanated through Harvard Yard, heads turned.

We looked like dirt.

We smelled like dirt.

But, we didn't care. We were together.

For the past week, the nine of us in TT2 trained to be leaders for the Freshman Outdoor Program (FOP). As part of our training trip, we lived in the woods for 9 days. We slept in tarps, hiked mountains, and grew more intimate than the average married couple.

So, how did we bond so quickly? One answer is, of course, time. But, I'm not convinced that time alone explains our closeness.

As we walked through campus, I took a final look at my FOP group. In each person, I saw someone who was more fun, genuine, and caring than anyone I'd ever met.

And, as I spoke with other FOP trips, I heard the same thing: meeting some of the best people of their lives.

Without fail, FOP leaders praised other members of their group.

So, how does this happen?

Why do FOP leaders love each other so much?

Most FOP leaders support one of two theories for this internal-lovefest. We'll call these "selection" and "reflection".

Selection Theory

In "selection", FOP leaders like each other because, well, FOP selects likable people. The selection process for FOP is very rigorous. It involves a long application, recommendations and interviews. Even more, FOP selects for a few traits: compassion, vulnerability, and a desire to help. As the theory goes, FOP leaders like each other because of fundamental similarities.

Reflection Theory

In "reflection", we admire other FOP leaders because we spend time getting to know them. During the training trip, a number of activities focus on reflection (e.g. Five Minute Biographies, Fear in a Hat). These activities help people be vulnerable with the group. As we know other FOP leaders on a deeper level, we grow to respect them more.

Both of these theories have merits. But, I propose that there is a third, more powerful reason for FOP's internal love-fest: The B.O.S.S. Effect (Believe Others are Super Stars).

This theory (co-created with Andreas Vandris and the rest of TT-2) is defined as: A phenomenon whereby searching for the boss in others we 1. Engage with them better and 2. Help them become bosses.

FOP leaders assume the best in each other. So, when meeting, our first instinct is to look for positive traits. To be clear, we don't always connect. But, we never shut down a relationship as a result. By looking for positive traits in FOP leaders, we find them. So, we develop the belief that others leaders are "a boss."

For the rest of the post, I'll explain the "boss effect" from three angles. First, I will show its impact on my training trip. Next, I will explore the scientific basis for the theory. Lastly, I will discuss its implications on life outside of FOP.

The Boss Effect in Science

In 1980, psychologist Dov Eden collaborated with the Israeli Defense Force (IDF) to find top-performing trainees. Before basic training, the IDF gave each soldier a rigorous test. After analyzing these assessments, Dov selected a platoon of soldiers that he believed had high potential for growth.

Sure enough, eleven weeks later, an independent exam found that this group performed significantly better than their peers. So, what did Dov see that the IDF didn't?

Nothing at all. Well, kinda.

Dov selected the "high-potential" group entirely at random. What he did do, however, was tell certain platoon leaders that he thought their group had high-potential for growth. As Adam Grant explains in "Give and Take," when the platoon leaders believed in the trainees' potential, they acted in ways that made this potential a reality—the supportive behaviors of the platoon leaders boosted the confidence and ability of the trainees.

In psychological research, this is called the self-fulfilling prophecy. And this phenomenon may explain the "boss effect." In FOP's training trips, we expect leaders to be caring, generous, and fun. So, because of these subconscious expectations, our leaders change to do so.

Implications

Individually: What if we applied the boss effect to everyone we met? As Liz Wiseman explains in "Multipliers," holding high expectations helps develop those around us. By searching for the good in others, we find and develop those traits.

For Groups: Align the mission of the group with the values of the members. Make your selection process rigorous. Lead by example—give praise freely, search for the "boss" in every person you meet.

So, thank you TT2. Your generosity, vulnerability, and sheer wit, made these the best 9 days of my life. You are all, as you know, true bosses.

Originally published on stephenturban.me.